How to Have a Nearly Unbreakable Hold on Happiness

Don’t fuss about trifles.

Dale Carnegie talked and wrote about this 80 years ago. It’s easy enough to understand, but ever so hard to do.

First, a trifle is something so small we shouldn’t even be concerned about it, right? It’s like getting a fleck of dust in your hair. Chances are you never even know it happened.

But what if trifles were anything that bothers us – that we give permission to bother us – and not just some little annoyance that drives us crazy? 

What if we could call anything that isn’t a nonnegotiable violation of living a trifle?

Just think how freeing that would be.


Say someone pulls out in front of you in traffic. You don’t die. You don’t get hurt. There’s not a scratch on either of your cars. Nothing really happened but a careless action that didn’t end badly. 

The worst that might happen is that you’re jolted out of your self-imposed reverie. 

You tell yourself when something bad happens, “I’ll laugh about this later.” If that’s true, why do you choose to stew about it now? 

There’s a lot that is out of your control. That’s just the way life is. But you still have control over your attitude. So why surrender that freedom to someone who is inconsiderate?

You don’t have to. 

So go ahead and call that little momentary annoyance a trifle. Talk to it. Say, “Trifle, you’re trying to beat me down. Well, I’m sorry, but you picked the wrong person. I’m not subject to your threats. Go away, and leave me alone.”

It’s time you took your life back. If you do what I just suggested, you might feel silly. But I guarantee if you believe what you say, you’ll have a hold on happiness that is nearly impossible to break.

Posted in dealing with stress, happiness, peace, Uncategorized.

I’m a Writing Coach, a Promotion Strategist, and an Entrepreneur. I help writers engage readers, sell their ideas, and build their tribes. I design non-sleazy promotion plans for artists, writers, and other creatives. When I’m not writing, I love coffee and conversation.